Lisa's Musings

there's little i control

crochethooks Originally uploaded by dressform.

I first spied the above crochet hooks on craftlog. yes I fell in want ~ luckily my local and lovely yarn store article pract (where I happen to have some trade credits!!) had them and so I was able to bring home a little present for myself. Not that I've had the time to use them, but it's just nice to know I have shiney plastic crochet hooks at my disposal. (why do shiney pieces of eye candy make me feel so good. is this so wrong?? they do fall under the useful category..... I could use another winter hat)

note to self: trust your gut instincts about some art situations. I had a bad feeling about attending an auction to which I donated a piece. I am happy I dontated it (not sure if would be of any interest to the crowd that showed - did it sell?? no idea) because it was a good cause - but I had a feeling that I would not like the presentation of the work and that this was going to be more about the party and the scene. the art was displayed on metal easels (yuck) and tables covered in black cloths. the lighting was BLUE and RED - you couldn't see what anything really looked like. it was dismal. did no one who was setting up think so? am I a comlete aesthitic snob for being irritated with this fact? I should have just donated a simple framed piece that could go on an easel. what was I thinking? sometimes ye have little faith for good reason

this sad tale has a delicious ending though... E & C got a freebie invite and came to offer support. hip hip hooray! and then they swooped me off to an insanely rich and luscious greek dinner. sigh. my belly is protruding with fabulous fullness. delight after delight - somehow both rich to the hilt, but light simultaneously. ending in a yogurt drenched in honey ambrosia.... saviors from the strange and surreal purple hazed vortex of that art thing (did I dream it?). thank goodness for otherwise I would have returned home sad and downtrodden in that bad art experience way (is there a word for this? should coin one - it deserves it's own word - maybe one with lots of consanents strung together in meaningless ways like pappavvvppppoooiephoey)

2 more things and then this long post will be over... 1) I am - SHHHHHH - hoping to sneak away into the studio for a spell tomorrow. don't tell all the people who are expecting things or wanting things from me. they all think I'm doing "legitimate" things (little do they know that the art part should be the most legit). I need a personal day. the targets are like sirens calling my name.... wanted some chain stitches or vintage buttons or both (oh my!) rifle targets cozied... nice. I am sort of afraid that the studio is going to be packed with studio mates - 2 have stated their presence would be likely. not that I don't want to see them, I just want some space (any space) to myself. the last week (is it longer? I have lost all sense of time) have been intense practically 14 hour day marathons. wake up, feed dogs, work, eat, work, eat, feed dogs, 2nd wind more work crawl into bed repeat - like bad shampoo bottle instructions.

2) the countess and I have made the main page! she pointed this out to me. surprise surprise! (of course they left it for us to discover - so sneaky and wonderfully surprising - like the magical envelopes that arrive unannounced). we are no longer just projects but part of the main event. wow.

patchwork_robotexplorer Originally uploaded by dressform.

I have been ill.... leave it to sickness to remind you to be grateful for your health! I am quite sad that I missed seeing my granma in my neck of the woods because of my illness.... I was going to show her the studio.... and have lunch. hopefully someother time! now I just have to catch up on all the things that I had to put off due to swimming heads and nose blowings... have I mentioned that a couple of pairs of hands would be a really cool thing about now? (does anyone have the patent /cloning technology for this? even better if they could operate independently from the body.....)

I have been thinking that I need to come up with catchy nicknames for folks - like how the countess does it. somehow though she has a way with words that I don't posses, and even though I have been wracking my still slightly stuffy head all day I can not think of a better nickname for the desert people. I can say that they now constitue a lovely clan of 3. the newest member came with to SF this week and may I just say that I hope she ends up coming to CCA to go to grad school - we could use her out here (although I know they would shed a tear in ABQ). spending time with them is just dreamy - not only do they only insist on eating impeccibly wonderful food, they are witty, immensly supportive, amazingly generous, and just downright fabulous to boot. I wish I could bottle them or have them closer to home.

the above little explorer robot went to an amazing home. some others from that patchwork series went places - I'm not sure yet where all of them landed - a few went to friends/colleagues which is incredibly sweet. it is exhilerating to have your work wanted and cherished by others.... (note to neurotic artist self: remember this feeling - especially during the creative slumps and low moments when you feel hopeless in the middle of a pile of nonsense in your studio. however try and not asess the value of your work based on whether or not it sells - that is where the danger lies. danger will robinson!). But back to my story, the woman (who is a poet and an excellent writer!!!!) of the couple who purchased this piece found my website and emailed me! she keeps a blog where she talks about their latest purchases and cultural matters. I was flattered to the hilt for what she wrote.... and this little robot is living in a library! that tickles me to no end!

two other wonderful art fair pick-ups:
the Marcel Dzama record from Trillium Press
and some vintage rifle targets from !yes! the desert clan. I can't wait to get those into the studio.... I just have to find some precious time.......

This whole week so far has been a mirror of my past life... installing at art fairs, gallery sitting.... I guess it isn't so much former since I'm still doing it - but it feels like all the stuff I used to do.... It's kind of fun in these small doses to be back in the sceney, funny, gossippy world that is art.... mostly it's nice to see all the work - art is everywhere - as it should be. I'm excited to see the booths tonight for the gala event.....

I spoke to the countess! THE aurora.... I was so nervous to call her (she called me last Friday in this breathless, charming voice and left a message). But after yesterday and hearing from R & V that we're so alike (which we ourselves had already surmised.... but second/affirming opinions are always nice) and spying the little cactus that she drew on her having a crate day crate I knew I could postpone it no longer.... it's like waiting for a first date this phone call has been... and I'm most happy to report that it went oh so well! why oh why is there a large land mass separating us? I really must/should/need to soon - get to NY. Plus I have to follow through on the idea of looking for a gallery out that way. Cold feet be gone... time to splish splash in the scary dark waters - maybe the art world isn't as spooky as I've made it out to be (or hopefully I can find more shallow brighly blue spots like the ones I have been fortunate enough to wade in. I think I am getting better at spotting sharks - harder are those chameleons - the ones that seem like good folks but who really are just going to call you friend for awhile - brightly and interestingly inquiring of so many things to only stop being so friendly once they have their eye on the prize. They are so good at shifting that sometimes I wonder if they even realize how hurtful and sleazy and self important they are being ~ maybe I'm giving them more slack than they deserve ~ maybe I should give it no more thought. I'm voting for option 2). Hopefully my art can move forward - and this I will never know with out trying.... grandiose dreams of having art be all or most of my work will never happen if I don't take some chances.... aurora is good inspiration in this department. she seems so courageous and fearless (and unbelivably human as well) and things are definitely happening for her! it's wonderful to behold.... (and have I told you our work is on the same wall at the fair??) and hopefully we chat again anon - to "iron" out some thoughts on our trade.... her phrasing and super apropo don't you think?

I guess old habits die hard?? I'm not sure how I managed this but I think that I am crossing that magic line of just busy into the land of crazy busy... OK, not entirely true - I do know how I did it (it is after all my fault) - perhaps I should have added something to my list of plans.... so here's a slight addendum.... not only will I spend more time in the studio guilt-free I will also learn the graceful art of saying no (even if I really could use the money) and the even more adept art of saying that I would love to, but perhaps in a couple of weeks..... I have already begun this practice and it seems to be working.... and practice makes perfect after all.

the reasons I'm headed into super busy mode are all fun, pleasant and happy things (which is why I really don't mind this jump start ~ I also think that I have lost a bit of my endurance edge from the lollygagging that went on with the holidays ~ also needed and periodically necessary). Like a visit up here from my grandmother.... and I'm excited to see my friends from the desert who have great taste in desserts (and food in general) and who have invited me to dine with them not once but TWICE - I AM a lucky girl! I think today I committed to work for my old boss at the art fair - I had thought that maybe I would not work it this year, but I can't resist his asking.... he's like family! how can I say no?? as long as I am not roped into the torture of jury duty (and why would they want such an opinionated fool?) I will be there Thurs and Fri - so if you are in the bay area and are headed to SFAI - come say hi!! I am thus revving my art engine and leaning into the curves (of which I'm sure there will be some).

so, now onto making lists, checking them twice and packing up some art for special delivery next week. wouldn't it be grand if I didn't have to take it all back with me....

new small drawings Originally uploaded by dressform.

this is a photo of the new little drawings I'm working on for the San Francisco Art Fair they are pretty darn small - under 4" - I'm excited because I feel like they are getting things underway for the New Year. I'm trying to stay loose and not get upset when one gets "messed up" - that's why I'm just working on bunches of them - in groups of 3's. (and that was the glass I was cutting with my fabulous glass cutting tool.... ohh... ahhh)

I don't really like New Year's Resolutions because they seem so darn daunting. (It's all the proper capital letters) I just feel like you are destined to fail and not meet your expectations if you set all these fancy Resolutions. There is enough disappointment in the world with out setting your own self up to fail - and so I shy away... however.... (perhaps this should be a However - with the capital - and maybe italicized for emphasis) I have been thinking quite a bit about what I really want to do with my time this Spring since I don't have a teaching gig and I'm not getting any younger.

I have decided to list some plans (in no order and of varying importance):
:: remember to bring your own tote bag to the grocery store. not that the free paper bags with handles aren't useful - because they ARE - but I don't need 30 of them under my sink!
:: get over the fear of submitting your work to galleries/non-profits and start doing a little bit of self-promotion (OK, realisitically I won't get over that fear - but perhaps I can shove it into the back of the closet as I attempt to send some packets out)
:: research some galleries/non-profits/residencies/grants to help you do the above and the REALLY apply/submit to the ones that look good!! (perhaps repitition helps to conquer fear)
:: spend more time in the studio with less or NO guilt. (the last part is the crucial point) I CAN be an artist by profession (even if I'm not making a lot of $$ at it). It is what makes me feel the most complete and satisfied and the dishes can get done at the end of the day instead of at the beginning.
:: look for and apply for more teaching jobs/pools. you can't get hired if people don't know you want the job.
:: make frothy milk lattes every morning for myself (I have been doing this and it is such a great way to start the day - it somehow makes that cup of coffee not just the necessary jolt to start the day but a luxurious perk)
:: read more fiction
:: read more art theory
:: buy a new computer (this one is overdue - and although I am going to wait until Macworld SF is over with - b/c it is only a few weeks away - I am NOT going to wait for the ellusive G5 laptop anymore. my ibook although it has served me well if FULL & TIRED! since I do make a living - well somewhat anyway - with these gadgets I just have to buck up and get a 0% finance credit card and buy the sucker! Uh - sorry to submit you to my own personal pep talk)

I think if I make this list any longer it will start to move into that resolution category... so I will stop for now.

Happy January 5th!

orange scarf Originally uploaded by dressform.

2005... wow. is it just me or does it still seem like yesterday that it was going to be 2000 - the new millenium - Y2K....

the above is my orange mohairey scarf that I finally finished over the holidays. crocheted with a pineappley stictch - and I added the tassles.... tassles are nice....

I'm not sure what to really say about the whole tsunami thing (especially since there is non-stop coverage everywhere). I have to not watch the images on TV for too long or I get too overwhelmed and sad. there is just nothing like the potential wrath of nature. If you are still looking for a way/place to donate - there's a great comprehensive list here (brought to my attention by altercation )

and Susan Sontag.... one smart lady... all these icons of thinking and culture disappearing from our view. thankfully they leave legacies behind.... one of my favorite quotes: But the charge of boredom is really hypocritical. There is, in a sense, no such thing as boredom. Boredom is only another name for a certain species of frustration.. The NY times had a nice piece on her today.

I think I will shy away from the requisite resolution list - but I have been thinking of things to accomplish... perhaps my next entry....

have a lovely 2005 (here goes nothing)!

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Name: lisa s
Location: oakland, CA, United States

hello and welcome to my blog. i'm a mixed media artist living in oakland, CA with my husband, 2 dogs, 1 cat and my baby daughter. i try to post once a week about things that inspire me, what's going on in my studio, and little tidbits of my life. thanks for visiting, reading and commenting!

please please please :: i am happy to have you use an image of mine on your blog or somewhere else, but PLEASE just ask permission before you do. and please don't hot link. it really is important that we respect one another and the work we do. and if you are too shy or busy to ask, could you at least link back to me? thank you in advance!


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